All material copyright Rohit Iyer unless otherwise stated.
Showing posts with label Misc. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Misc. Show all posts

27 January 2009

Who Wants to be an Oscar Nominee?



Like everyone I had been waiting eagerly for the announcement of the Oscar nominations and boy was I disappointed. I was very, very put off by the 10 nominations that Slumdog Millionaire received and let me tell you why. Although the Oscars are not definitive in any way, let's be honest here - they do hold some weight amongst the film community.

Slumdog Millionaire is by no means a great film. It is a good film but not a great one. I'm a big fan of Danny Boyle and he does great work here. But it's the script that had me tearing my hair out! Simon Beaufoy's screenplay is so convoluted, so contrived and so uneven that the fact that the film is being appreciated so much only goes to show what a great director Danny Boyle is. I am an Indian and while this rant has nothing to do with the current media buzz about Slumdog being "poverty porn" or misrepresentational, this has everything to do with Slumdog's story being devoid of common sense.

I can buy the idea of the gameshow questions framing the narrative; in fact I think it's a really good idea. But there are plot holes in this script that I could drive a space shuttle through. I understand that it's a fairytale. I understand that I have to suspend my disbelief and enjoy the ride. What I don't understand is that I have to watch these unbelievable characters contradict themselves and contradict logic at the same time. Would a gameshow host really be jealous of a contestant? Would said contestant be tortured for cheating as if he'd planted a bomb on the set? If the money is not so important to Jamal, does he even have to answer the question once he's found Latika? After showing us the harrowing childhood that he had can we really believe that this British-English speaking call-center employee is the same boy?

Let me confess here that I did enjoy the film. I'm just getting bothered with the hype, awards and otherwise, that is being generated around it when there are other, more deserving films around. Maybe it is a fascination with "exotic India". Maybe awards nominations are based on agendas: we have a holocaust movie, an epic life story, a political movie, a gay-rights movie, and Slumdog Millionaire. But to give this a nomination for Best Adapted Screenplay over so many of the other gems we had last year is just hypocritical. Does this film really deserve to win or did it just get lucky with its lifelines?

15 December 2008

40 Inspirational Speeches in 2 Minutes

Quite brilliant!

17 June 2008

Film Junkie...

I'm one too!



More over here:

http://www.slashfilm.com/2008/06/16/votd-film-junkie/#more-12158

4 June 2008

Busy...

I found this excerpt from Norton Juster and Jules Feiffer's The Phantom Tollbooth (which, by the way, I've never read). But I very faintly remembered seeing the animated adaptation as a child and although I couldn't even remember the name, thanks to the internet I didn't have to. Ironically enough, this excerpt describes my day almost perfectly.

"Well, if you can't laugh or think, what can you do?" asked Milo.

"Anything as long as it's nothing, and everything as long as it isn't anything," explained another.

"There's lots to do; we have a very busy schedule-

"At 8 o'clock we get up, and then we spend

"From 8 to 9 daydreaming.

"From 9 to 9:30 we take our early midmorning nap.

"From 9:30 to 10:30 we dawdle and delay.

"From 10:30 to 11:30 we take our late early morning nap.

"From ll:00 to 12:00 we bide our time and then eat lunch.

"From l:00 to 2:00 we linger and loiter.

"From 2:00 to 2:30 we take our early afternoon nap.

"From 2:30 to 3:30 we put off for tomorrow what we could have done today.

"From 3:30 to 4:00 we take our early late afternoon nap.

"From 4:00 to 5:00 we loaf and lounge until dinner.

"From 6:00 to 7:00 we dillydally.

"From 7:00 to 8:00 we take our early evening nap, and then for an hour before we go to bed at 9:00 we waste time.

"As you can see, that leaves almost no time for brooding, lagging, plodding, or procrastinating, and if we stopped to think or laugh, we'd never get nothing done."

"You mean you'd never get anything done," corrected Milo.

"We don't want to get anything done," snapped another angrily; "we want to get nothing done, and we can do that without your help."

"You see," continued another in a more conciliatory tone, "it's really quite strenuous doing nothing all day, so once a week we take a holiday and go nowhere, which was just where we were going when you came along. Would you care to join us?"

"I might as well," thought Milo; "that's where I seem to be going anyway."

31 May 2008

Anonymity

hi, my name is wren-underscore-86 and i am an internet-aholic.

HI WREN-UNDERSCORE-86!!!

i’ve been online for two-and-a-half weeks now...

GOOD FOR YOU, WREN-UNDERSCORE-86!!!

no, no... that’s not good. in fact, this is the longest i’ve been online ever.

in fact, it’s the longest i’ve been anything.

WREN-UNDERSCORE-86, YOU’RE AN INSPIRATION TO US ALL!!!

try to understand this – i am trying to break free... but, i can’t stop typing!

CLAP!!! CLAP!!! CLAP!!!

don’t applaud me, you morons! this isn’t something to celebrate! i’m fucking trapped!

TRAPPED!!! TRAPPED!!! TRAPPED!!!

i should’ve never clicked the link! i shouldn’t have! i did it against my better judgement... internet-aholics anonymous, my ass!

THANK YOU FOR USING WWW.IA.COM. YOUR FREE ACCOUNT HAS EXPIRED.

what the fuck?

YOU ARE NOW BEING CHARGED DIRECTLY FROM YOUR ACCOUNT...

what the fuck?!!!

IF YOU DO NOT WISH TO CONTINUE PLEASE CLICK--

wtf?!!

LOADING... LOADING... LOADING...

omfg!!!

10 December 2007

It's true! YouTube DOES bring back childhood memories!

18 October 2007

Apparently, I should live in...



What City Should You Live In?

You should live in New York City. America's largest city will ensure that you will blend into the crowd. You are the brooding type--introspective, creative, and eccentric--and NYC's cutting-edge, individualistic culture and ambience will appeal to you.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

9 August 2007

I've been SIMPSONIZED!!!


http://www.simpsonsmovie.com/

22 June 2007

Poll - Do I look like this?


Via Priyankar's Blog

Drawn by him too.

16 June 2007

WALL*E



Watch the teaser trailer here - http://www.apple.com/trailers/disney/walle/

And the read the plot description here - http://jimhillmedia.com/blogs/jim_hill/archive/2007/02/26/toon-tuesday-again.aspx

15 June 2007

Rocket Science




Too "Little Miss Sunshine-Garden State-Napolean Dynamite-ish"?

I think so. But the trailer's got me interested anyway.

Watch all of these...

...NOW!

(Click on "Video Playlist" to select)

13 June 2007

Fun, fun, fun!!!

Games at Miniclip.com - Gun RunGun Run

Shoot everything to survive.

Play this free game now!!

24 May 2007

You've Never, "You've Never"-ed?

If you're like me then you really hate it when anyone springs the endlessly pretentious, "You've never...?", in the course of a conversation.

For instance, if at the mention of say... Pavlov, you innocently ask, "Er... what's pavlov?", it's very likely that you'll be hit with the remark, "You've never heard of Pavlov?" Incidentally Pavlov could refer to anyone of several famous (usually Russian) people.

Variations on this way of showing off (with appropriate examples) are:

-"You've never been to Fiji?"
-"You haven't seen Citizen Kane?"
-"You haven't read Gone With The Wind?", quickly followed by
"You haven't WATCHED Gone With The Wind?"
-"You've never been bungee-jumping?"
-"You've never heard of Guaocamole?"

This kind of name dropping is quite irritating. I don't understand why anyone would find it hard to believe that there's a first time for everything and that no one really knows everything. I myself have had the temptation to "You've never" some people, especially when it's regarding some of the more trivial bits of general knowledge. Yet it is definitely ridiculous to assume that every person must have gone through the same education/experiences as you and therefore knows all that you know.

In fact, even the belief that this assumption exists is false. Because, ideally the "You've never?" line is the ideal opportunity to show off one's superior knowledge regarding the world.

So how do we battle this phenomenon?

Simple. We just do unto others as they do unto us. Like so:

Pretentious Prick (From now on referred to as PP): So the other day I got into an argument about Sartre's Being and Nothingness...
You: Er... Sartre?
PP: You're kidding me? You've never heard of Jean-Paul Sartre?
You: Oh, Jean-Paul Sartre? I thought you were referring to Sartre of Mignon, the hidden beast also referred to in some circles as, "The Jolly Roger".
PP: Huh?
You: Don't tell me - you've never heard of The Jolly Roger?

Walk off immediately as though you are thorougly disgusted at such a possibility.

24 March 2007

Mmmmmmm......

25 October 2006

Our hours are spent in maintenance.
We are the janitors of our lives.

4 September 2006

What's in a name?

Monday depression.

I'm such a moody guy. I've been thinking about names among other things. I remember that my blog WAS called Wren's World. "Wren" was a word/name I was attached to for a long time, for no particular reason.

Later, I changed to just "Rohit Iyer", because actually... that's the kind of person I am.

Why did I have to go and look at all these other sites with cool names like "". com?

Maybe I should call my blog - "The Man Eating Tiger". Huh?

The deal with Blogger is that you can change the name, but not the URL. That involves a lot of complications. And should I keep starting new blogs for every new idea I have?

*There really IS a "The Man Eating Tiger" Blog, by the way... http://maneatingtiger.blogspot.com/ - I made it. Ha!

It's all really... complicated.

The security in naming one's blog after oneself is that you KNOW you'll always be attached to your name, whereas you might always grow out of a funky, fundoo whatchamacallit cool name.

Yeah...

"And tomorrow folks - we'll talk about templates! What template defines YOU?"

Arrgh! Priorities... that's what I need. BOO-YAH!

2 September 2006

How It Should Have Ended

Found this over on YouTube - It ranks right up there with Angry Alien and The Cowboy Critic. For more secret endings to your favourite movies, check out http://www.howitshouldhaveended.com.

14 August 2006

The Alley

For a short story assignment based on any proverb...

The Alley

By Rohit Iyer

A man was walking down a lane in London when someone hissed at him from inside an alley. “Come in here”, said a voice and a finger emerged from the darkness indicating to the man that he should enter. Being a curious man he made his way into the alley. There he found an attractive woman who looked to be in her thirties. She was chained to the wall. The man asked her, “Who’re you?” She replied, “I’m Kate Moss – the supermodel”. The man smiled and asked, “So what do you want from me?” She answered, “My entire family has disowned me because of my alleged involvement with cocaine usage last year. I am trapped in this alley. I need you to get all my family members here. Only they can free me. In return I will grant you three wishes. Ask and you shall receive.” The man thought for a while and decided on all three at once. He said, “I wish to be rich, famous and talented.” POOF! The man transformed into Keith Richards. He looked shocked and he screamed, “This is not what I asked for!” to which Kate said, “It’s the best I could do. Now please go and get my family!” The man said, “Sorry. No can do.” She was frantic, “Why not?!” As the man walked out of the alley with his guitar over his shoulder he whispered, “Lady - A Rolling Stone gathers no Moss.”

7 August 2006

The Ten Anti-Commandments

I should print this and stick it up on the wall in front of me.